Dear Fellow Believers,

This one is emotional for me, especially the end. But first: the beginning.

We express our disappointment that no one seems to care about God. We have known this to be true intellectually, but it always hurts. Probably the MOST not interested in God is the one closest to us whom we would expect to be the most interested in God: our producer Ricardo Johnson. But he gives not a shit, or a damn, or a fuck. He pretends to, but he doesn't. He's a Baptist Christian, a typical pseudo-believer who doesn't want to be bothered with the truth.

Denise starts it off. You can hear it in her voice. Then I take over the rant. And really, Denise's rant and mine are one and the same. No one listening wants to know. "The truth is in your midst, but no one wants to know. God has visited you, but you have all turned Him away. You have crucified Christ afresh." We try to make it polite, and we nearly succeed. Nearly. But you can hear it.

Rodney blew me away at the end of this video. He took a song that I used to finish a "Crack O' Dawn" report video back in August of 2011 ("December," by Collective Soul) and he extended it while posting video of God's varied and beautiful creation, simultaneously putting verses on the screen attesting to the greatest truths of God—you know, the truths no one cares about.

I don't expect anyone else to weep at the end of this video, but I did. Maybe no one has quite been through the rejection I have—it's hard to say. The lyrics from this song are poignant for me:

"Why drink the water from my hand, 
Contagious as you think I am? 
Just tilt my sun toward your domain, 
Your cup runneth over again."

I dispense blessings and get rejection in return. And yet some women will use you at your full capacity. THEN they will leave you. You have the words of eonian life and yet they lie about you, considering you a scourge upon the world. And yet, all the while, you continue to bless them, possessing the love of God for them.

"Why follow me to higher ground, 
Lost as you swear I am? 
Don't throw away your basic needs, 
Ambience and vanity."

Their basic needs are ambience and vanity. And yet they will follow you to higher ground as long as it suits them, all the while calling you "lost." It is your basic needs (the spirit of God) versus their basic needs (self-protection and furniture), and you will lose–at least in THIS eon.

"Turn your head now, baby, just spit me out."

And then there's Ricardo Johnson. And 99.99% of our audience in the summer of 1999. But the Lord stood with us.

Thank you, Rodney, for taking us all on a trip. Especially me.

From the peninsula,

Martin